Dangerous

(but rewarding)

I have been described as such and am honored to be so.

I found two new blogs yesterday. One is Margaret's, and her stuff is always interesting to read. Besides, hers looks a lot prettier than mine.
The other one surprised me - Ryan Corbi's, my little brother from Singers. Great guy, wonderfully deep guy that doesn't try to be deep. A man of faith and a man of horrendous sexual comments. Some woman is going to get really lucky with him.
Two great new blogs to read. :)

Our team lost all 3 games last night to fall to 4-8. We played a good team, but our serving abanonded us in game 1, our serve receive in game 2, and our passing and hitting in game 3. None of these bode well for competitive volleyball. The only highlight of the night was Nate going up for a middle hit and obliterating this thing. The other team's big middle blocker deflected it sideways, but it lost none of its velocity and hit a rather well-endowed female opponent directly in the chest. I am not making this up when she grabbed her chest and yelled, "Ow!! ...Now I'll never be able to breast-feed!"
Question here. Do women think that getting in hit in the chest is as painful as a guy getting hit in the groin? Having been on the receiving end of my share of groin blows (usually from basketball) I can tell you that when you really get hit there, it's excruciating. You know you've gotten hit bad if the pain sort of goes up and resides in your kidneys. Ouch. This is why whenever other guys see another guy get nailed in the family jewels, the instinctive reaction is to wince and shield the area. They know the pain.

This actually leads to a long-standing discussion I've had with some friends. Is it better to be a man, or a woman? I've come to my own conclusion, but let's look at the evidence.

Women (minuses):
- That time of the month. Leak in the plumbing.
- The 'joy' of childbirth. Like an elephant through a Cheerio.
- Women stereotypes. Sexism, less able to handle high-powered jobs, seen as sexual objects first, the list goes on.
- 9 months of pregnancy. Like carrying around a bowling ball, and you can't exercise, can't run, and can't bend over.
- Multiple fluctuating hormone events. Puberty, time of the month, pregnancy, sexual peak, menopause, all of them can send the recipient to LaLa Land.

Women (pluses):
- Freedom of any hair style. Try being a guy in the corporate world with hair longer than your ears.
- Choice in 'good' clothing. Dresses, formal jacket, all colors and designs. Men have the choice of: a suit.
- The joy of childbirth. A beautiful miracle.
- Longer lifespan, by an average of at least 9 years. What would people pay for 9 more years of life?
- Women stereotypes: demure, not meant for physical activity, etc. Trust me, there are many women who use this to their advanatage. How many guys have come to kill a large spider or clean the gutters at a woman's bequest?
- Vastly more accepted sexual behavior. Guys are supposed to like all come ons from women. If I gave a smile and a wink to a female coworker, I could honestly be fired. If I tried to get a woman in trouble for the same, I'd probably be laughed at.

Women (conclusion): More pluses than minuses, but some of those minuses are BIG minuses, namely the time of the month and the nine months of pregnancy. Both of those would be rough to handle. The fluctuating hormones seems to effect some women more than others. I actually have great respect for women who I can't tell when they are having some wild hormone run. On the other hand, I've known women that announce their body processes like a train schedule.
Ah well. On to:


Men (minuses):

- Male stereotypes: strong, unemotional, decisive. You'd really be surprised how unconsciously people still follow these.
- External genitalia. For all women who think this is not a big deal, I urge you to watch a guy's face after he pictures these five words: "Baseball bat to the gonads."
- Sex-inherited diseases. Having only one 'X' chromosome makes us very susceptible to a lot of things. The vast majority of women never have to deal with male-pattern baldness, colorblindness, hemophila, all 100x more likely in men than women.
- The prostate exam. It doesn't get much more unpleasent than this.
- Draft. Women will never be required to fight in a war. This is far scarier today than it was four years ago.

Men (pluses):
- Male stereotypes: Let them play the game, boys will be boys. A certain amount of leeway is given where destruction is concerned.
- Physical attributes: In general, it has been evolutionarily true that males are stronger, faster, and taller than females.
- Sexual promiscuity: If a woman sleeps with three guys in a week, she's a slut. If a guy sleeps with three women in a week, he's a hero.

Men (conclusion): The other side of the coin, I think there are more problems with being male than most people give credit for. The pluses, on the other hand, have been banged into everyone's head since the beginning of time.


FINAL CONCLUSION: So what do we come out of this with? Ah-ha. I would normally say this is a pretty even match. However, there is one element that has been overlooked, the ultimate wildcard, the one element that does indeed mean that IT IS BETTER TO BE MALE THAN FEMALE! I present you:

Men (pluses):
- Can pee standing up.

I have talked to more women who state that this is their biggest lament. Not pregnancy, not physical attributes, not even the once a month drag, but the inability to pee standing up is infuriating. It's so easy! The woods, the fields, just 'zip' and there you go!
In conclusion, women do not, Mr. Freud, have penis envy. They have pee envy.

I don't allow comments on my blog, but I would love to hear thoughts on the matter - from both genders - if I left off pluses or minuses for either side. Maybe I'll publish a collection of thoughts on the matter. You know where to find me.